Don’t stop after step one
Thank God Rebbe Nachman’s advice to practice hisbodedus daily is heeded by many people worldwide. I don’t like to be a stickler but can I suggest that we’ve been missing a key part of the formula?
Let’s see the text (Tinyana 25):
“וְיִזָּהֵר מְאֹד לְהַרְגִּיל עַצְמוֹ לְהַתְמִיד בָּזֶה מִדֵּי יוֹם בְּיוֹם שָׁעָה מְיֻחֶדֶת כַּנַּ”ל. וּשְׁאָר כָּל הַיּוֹם יִהְיֶה בְּשִׂמְחָה”
“One should be very careful to accustom himself to practicing [hisbodedus] consistently, designating an hour every day for it. And the rest of the day he should be happy“.
What happened to the second part? “And the rest of the day he should be happy”. When we finish our daily session with Hashem, there’s nothing to worry about anymore. He’s got our back. We need to stop going around moaning and groaning still about how hard everything is. That’s (partly) what hisbodedus is for. Let it all out there and then after, feel the relief and trust that the boss will take care of His part.
The truth is, the Rebbe writes that one can actually determine if he truly let go and opened his heart to Hashem based on his feelings afterwards. If he doesn’t feel happy, maybe his broken heart wasn’t what he thought it was? (Sichos Haran 45)
.אחר לב נשבר בא שמחה, וזה סימן, אם היה לו לב נשבר כשבא אחר כך לשמחה
There are so many benefits to practicing this type of unique prayer, but what could be better than feeling happy all the time? It’s like everything else in life, the more we believe it, the more it affects us. If we truly believed that we just finished entreating the most loving King of the Universe, who wants nothing else but to help us grow and succeed, then we must follow through after it with a real feeling of comfort, ease and simple happiness.
Hashem, help us make the time to talk real to You. Put the rights words in our mouth and open up our hearts of stone. Lead us deeper and deeper into our minds and souls, so we can tear through our fakeness and shallowness. We’re sitting here anyways, help us be real! Help us believe in You all the way. Help us believe that You truly hear our voices calling You. Let us break down and cry to You, like a child to their father. Then lift us up and help us trust that You will take care of the rest. All we can do is call out, so help us talk the truth. We know that if we can do it, nothing feels better. You got this! There’s nothing left for us to do, but sing and dance all day long!