Using the poetic license of Reb Nosson, we can see Esther as an aspect of the Jewish people, Mordechai as the generation’s tzaddik emes and, of course, the king as Hashem, the Holy, and One and Only King.
You might notice in the megilla that there are just a handful of conversations between Esther and the King. What’s more peculiar is that when Esther addresses the King, she always prefaces it with some version of the following statement:
אִם־מָצָ֨אתִי חֵ֜ן בְּעֵינֵ֣י הַמֶּ֗לֶךְ וְאִם־עַל־הַמֶּ֨לֶךְ֙ ט֔וֹב
“If I find favor in the king’s eyes, and if it pleases the king”
The Malbim explains this seemingly redundant statement. Esther’s request was made on two conditions: First, that the king should grant her request simply because he desires her, and secondly, that the request itself should also be something that the King desires.
Which condition was first? אִם־מָצָ֨אתִי חֵ֜ן בְּעֵינֵ֣י (If I find favor in the king’s eyes). Esther knew that the critical condition was that He would desire her. It must have taken a great deal of pride for Esther to make such a condition. “I want you to give it to me because you love me” can only be said when you feel lovable.
Seems like Esther’s entire struggle is so relatable to the struggles that we all have. “The King hasn’t called my number in quite a long time, and you know what? Who have I become anyways? I’m not living the life I used to live. I’m surrounded by things that distract me from the person I remember myself to be. And now, my people need me, (me?!) to do something on their behalf? Me? I’m the person? Am I really capable of making a change? Am I worthy of coming before the king? Does my avodah mean anything”? Then the tzaddik sends you a message, “You can do it! You really can. ‘Maybe’ this is why you found yourself here in the first place? It’s yours for the taking, but only when you believe you have what it takes. You need to love yourself, empower yourself, and believe that only you can make this happen”.
Esther did it. She got the message from Mordechai and she really believed in who she was. וַתִּלְבַּ֤שׁ אֶסְתֵּר֙ מַלְכ֔וּת – She dressed differently, that’s symbolic of her new self. And as she took those final few steps in that last dark hallway, Amalek’s doubts engulfed her mind. “I don’t knowww?!” “Am I sure about this?” But then when she was called on, she said “Give it to me because you want me”. I AM LOVABLE. I know it and You know it.
Just like when there are two ends of a drain pipe, there can only be two possibilities of where the pipe can get clogged; either from above or from below. So it is with the shefa of blessing and success that we need from Hashem. Either it’s clogged from above, meaning that we don’t believe enough that He can give it to us. Or it’s clogged from below, meaning that we don’t believe we can receive it, aka we’re not worthy enough/good enough/smart enough/lucky enough to receive it.
This is everything my friends! This is all we need to be successful. We need to always believe the King wants to give it and believe we are lovable enough to get it. And when we do,