Our Own World
How can I describe how I feel about something?
Everybody in this world has their own unique emotions and feelings. It’s true that many people share similar characteristics and personalities but the sum total of a person’s consciousness can never be defined because it’s absolutely one of a kind.
King David sings “כי אני ידעתי כי גדול י-הוה ואדונינו מכל אלה-ים” (I know that [our] God is greater than any other gods). Rebbe Nachman (‘שיחות הר״ן א) explains that King David was saying “I know God is great” and only I know that God is great. Does this mean that the humble David was boasting about his spiritual and prophetic level? No. What David meant to say is that it’s impossible to relate to another human being the greatness of God. And, as a matter of fact, it’s even impossible to explain the feeling and understanding to ones own self, because tomorrow’s new understanding will replace today’s feelings and I’ll never remember the uniqueness of today.
Life’s experiences are wondrous but on a deeper level they are defined by our particular perceptions. Meaning, what I see isn’t what you see. You might cite Nature vs. Nurture or call this phenomenon something else, but the bottom line is that my world is defined by how I view things and everybody has their own creative mind which leads them to their unique conclusions.
Sometimes this makes me feel isolated, lonely and misunderstood. We humans want to relate to others and if we are living in our own world, then how can we know what’s right and how to think? Not only that but sometimes I try describing to people my thoughts and emotions and I’m left feeling frustrated by their inability to understand me or by their own self absorbed biases. But somehow when I speak to Hashem (God) in my own words I truly feel fully understood. I can’t explain it! Even though I find it difficult to describe my feelings to Him, I believe that He ‘fills in the blanks’ for me and I’m left feeling understood, alleviated, relaxed and at ease.